


Just Another Day

by Assassin_J



Category: Assassin's Creed, [PROTOTYPE]
Genre: Birthday Party, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Surprise Party, i'm the queen of abrupt endings, spongecreed protopants, 中文翻译 | Translation in Chinese
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 00:39:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5949505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Assassin_J/pseuds/Assassin_J
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A thing I writ on July 16 last year in resp to thewritingmustache's prompt "DESMOND THROWING ALEX A ONE-MAN BIRTHDAY PARTY, LET’S GOOO"</p><p>Woulda put it on AO3 sooner but I didn't know what to do for a title. I very nearly just went with yet another George Hrab lyric but in the last minute I saw an Oingo Boingo CD laying around and went with one of their lyrics instead.</p><p>so here ya go, peeps</p><p>Has been translated into Chinese by ccherus: <a href="http://herus.lofter.com/post/1cadd542_10eaa969">http://herus.lofter.com/post/1cadd542_10eaa969</a></p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Another Day

“World’s Best Virus Boyfriend,” Alex reads the banner impassively.  


Desmond grins and nods. “Yep.”

“Technically correct.”

“Well of course it’s correct!”  


“Do any other ‘virus boyfriends’ exist?”

Desmond blinks, then facepalms. “Look, it’s supposed to be a compliment, dickwad.”

“World’s Best Virus Dickwad,” Alex says, completely deadpan, but Desmond thinks he detects a bit of humor buried deep underneath.  


“Yeah, that’s about right.”  


Alex turns his attention from the banner to the rest of the room. There are a couple colorfully-wrapped boxes and a covered platter on a side table. The cover doesn’t stop his superhuman senses from knowing what’s under it, though. “Why isn’t that steak in the fridge?” he asks, pointing.

Desmond grins again. “Cause it’s for you. To ea- to consume.” He steps over to the table and lifts the cover off the steak with a dramatic flourish. “Happy Birthday, Alex!”  


Alex’s mouth twitches at the sight of the marbled meat-slab, at the candles jammed stupidly into it. “Desmond,” he growls.

[“Do you love it?” Desmond asks.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zaC5UQNYZ6A)  


Alex flings his arm across the room like a bungee cord, tearing the candles out and scattering them over the table edge. “Today’s that asshole **doctor’s**  birthday, you stupid **cock**! I’m not **him**! I just **look**  like him by default!”

 _Oh shit._  Desmond shrinks back from the whipfist’s wild attack. “Um. Sorry,” he manages to squeak. “I.. I thought you’d maybe wanna celebrate it anyway?” The look on Alex’s face tells him this idea is not going to pan out, so he tries a different tack. “Or, uh, you wanna tell me when **your**  birthday is, and we’ll go with that in the future?”

Alex frowns and hunches over. “I wasn’t born. I was... manufactured. Bio-engineered.”  


Desmond flails his arms in the air. “Well when’s your ‘bioengineerday’, then?”

“It’s...” Alex’s eyes flicker as he searches his memory. “...I... came into awareness... November fifth.”  


“Oookay. So, should I put this steak in the freezer ‘til then?”  


Alex finally allows a small smile to show. “Of course not.” He digs his claws into the juicy meat, subsuming it into himself and leaving a bloody mess on the platter. “Freezer burn.”  



End file.
